When losing is actually gaining!

Each one of us has gone through different experiences during this pandemic - some positive, some learning and some not-so-good. I wanted to highlight an area where I have used this period to focus on my health, which has been positive and a learning experience. 

Before the pandemic started, I was at about 84 kgs and at a BMI of 29.1 (overweight according to the BMI scale). Today, I weigh 65.8 kgs - 22.8 on the BMI scale (Normal). While I realize BMI is not the only way to measure health, yet at the same time, I feel more refreshed and  energized. To me, that is always a good feeling

Based on feedback,  I wanted to pen down a short post on my journey, in case it helps you. I am not an expert nor did I follow any fancy gym etc. 

Before you start

• Invest in a good digital weighing scale. I had a manual one earlier and would never get a accurate weight. This led to demotivation and hence a start-pause-stop phase
• Check with your doctor before you start any weight loss journey - this is essential. 
• Buy a good smart watch. This helps you keep track as well as motivate you. I have a Samsung Gear S3 Frontier. 
• Enlist friends and family for support - they can be good motivators too. 
• Have a good playlist of songs (I used Gaana!) and a wireless headset.   

What I did

• I started off with intermittent fasting (16 - 8 i.e. 16 hours fasting and 8 hours eating). So I would eat dinner early at around 5 pm and then have breakfast at around 9 am the next day. You can start off by 12 - 12 if you want (12 hours break after dinner)
• If you feel hungry after dinner, you can drink some soup. 
• I started with a jog every day for 30 minutes initially and then slowly increased it to 45 mins and then 60 mins. On my watch, this was around 8000 steps (watches do vary). Since I could not jog outside, I used to jog in my hall itself. 
• I also played music to keep me distracted since running in the hall can become boring
• I would also walk after meals (lunch and dinner) for 10 - 15 mins each. At the end of the day, I had usually clocked 12000 steps or more
• Food - I ate everything including pizzas (albeit wheat pizzas), pav bhaji  with butter etc. I had tea 3 or 4 times , normal tea not green tea. While I ate whatever I wanted, I ensure I did not eat too much or too little. Eating too little impacted the metabolism negatively. I also ate French Fries etc but again within reason and not everyday
• I kept track on the smart watch and then on the phone (Samsung App). I also made notes on when I was losing weight and the food I ate. This is different for each person so you need to track for yourself. For example, when I ate pizzas, I lost weight if I had paneer toppings (I guess the proteins and veggies helped)
• I also kept track of my weight at the end of the day. This helped me calculate my metabolism during sleep
• After a few months, when I was in the 74 range or so, I did a combination of running and exercises. I still ran for 45 mins but added exercises. The reason to do that was to ensure I developed better metabolism and it lasts. 
• I used a combination of 3 workout routines by Chloe Ting. I liked her routines because they are not too difficult and she is very encouraging

• Warm Up exercises
  
• Lean Arms Challenge
  
• Abs workout
  

• You can decide which ones you want to but I would suggest you definitely do the first one (warm up) and then alternate between 2 and 3.
• Do drink water - while you will see a weight gain as soon as you drink, it helps flush out toxins and help in the long run. 

Now

• I DO NOT jog much now. I still do Exercise 1 and 3 (and on some days 2) and then end with  short run (around 10 mins)
• This way I spend only 30 mins per day but try keep my lowest weight in the day to be 65.x 
• I eat dinner at around 7 pm, mucnh something at around 9.30 and have breakfast at 10 am

Do remember two things

1. Each of us is unique so what works for me might not work for you but you will find it out eventually

2. There will be good days and bad days - it is the average that counts. 

The picture below tells the story - I did gain by losing! 

Top 10 ways of recognizing a Kolkattan

10. You believe firmly that Mumbai might have the rich, Delhi might have the powerful people, Bangalore might have its techies but the REAL intellectuals live in Kolkatta

9. You grew up with you two names - one official one and one good name .The good name will embarrass you as you grow up but will remain for the rest of your life

8. Bandhs are normal to you and part of life. In fact, all bandhs are on Monday or Friday and published in advance so you can make travel reservations. Work can always wait....that is left to to those always busy Mumbaikars

7. You love sweets - period.  No meal is complete without it sometimes it is a meal by itself. 

6. You recognize easily that you are entering a Bengali neighbourhood by the aroma (smell to others maybe) of mustard oil.

5. You can call any guy a Dada irrespective of the fact that you might have a romantic interest in him

4. Every street has its own Phuchka valla (okay golgappas to the hoi polloi) and everyone claims he is the best one in town. The same is true for rolls too or any food, for that matter!

3. You know the best pandals in town and Pujo is the best time to shop irrespective of religion.

2. You have the answers to every issue in the world and can discuss them passionately in the "adda"(Of course, none of them get implemented in your own city)

and the number one way of recognizing a Kolkattan (drum roll please)
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1. You know the best looking women in the country are from your city!!

My realizations..

1.       Today's realization - thanks to the Ice Bucket Challenge, I have been privileged to view many people's bathrooms!

2.       Today's realization - what is the point of showing ads to sell TVs ON TV itself? If your current image quality is bad, then the one shown inside the ad will also be fuzzy. If your current image quality is good, why will you want to buy a new one anyway?

3.       Today's realization (thanks to some commuting between two ends of town) - Three definite things in Hyderabad 1) why paint the lanes when no one follows it? 2) Red lights are a mere suggestion 3) incessant honking clears all traffic in front of you apparently

4.       Today's realization - the happiest in the world on my birthday (a couple of weeks back) seemed to be my insurance company because they could avoid a payout - so evident in their birthday greetings.

5.       Today's realization - 0.01 seconds is the amount of time after the signal turns green that the person behind you starts honking asking you to move on....

6.       Today's realization - I saw a poster with pictures of multiple people on it near a busy intersection. Initially, I thought they were the local small time politicians and their cronies trying to get publicity. When I went near and saw closely, it was actually a warning with pictures of pickpockets in the area and not the local politicians. Then I realized - there was ACTUALLY no difference!

7.       Today's realization - it is easier to wake up at 6.15 am on a weekend than to do it on a Monday morning after a long weekend after all the festivities and with such gloomy weather outside. But then I did...

8.       Today's realization - there is always that one person in a meeting who basically waits for everyone to give an opinion, picks up key points from each person and then summarizes it to make it sound as if he has a very strategic & broad perspective thus impressing the boss!

9.       Today's realization - each parent believes that the good attributes in the child comes from his/her's genes while the bad attributes comes from the spouse's side...

10.   Today's realization - there is ALWAYS an aunt who knows you from childhood and remembers every embarrassing incident in your life (peeing in your shorts, some word you mispronounced etc.) and will recount every teeny-weeny detail to your new bride (thus damaging the image you built of yourself during your courtship days!)

11.   Today's realization - there was ALWAYS one teacher in school that you especially liked (okay okay - had a crush on) which made you go to school on a Monday morning!

12.   Today's realization - your worst picture in life is usually on some form of id - passport, driver's licence, voter card etc. and can be a constant source of amusement to your friends.

13.   Today's realization - the line that I stand in ALWAYS turns out to have the one of the following - the worst checkout person in the world , a terminal which cannot scan correctly, a guy with a credit card that does not work or the person with the biggest shopping basket ever!

14.   Today's realization - ever notice when you are driving that you feel the guy who overtakes you is driving too fast while the guy you are following is driving too slowly?

15.   Today's realization - there is ALWAYS a little bit of your mother in your little daughter...

16.   Today's realization - ever notice that the dress/shirts they have on the mannequin is never in stock inside the store? If it is in stock, it is not in your size! If you are lucky and they do have it in the store and in your size, when you finally wear it, it does not look half as good on you as on the dummy outside!!

17.   Today's realization - ever notice that the videographer is actually the director of your marriage ceremony and we are but mere actors? Also, did you ever realize that he is the most irritating person when you are stuffing your mouth?

18.   Today's realization - even though you know the daily forecast in the paper cannot cover the millions of people under the zodiac sign, you still feel happy when it predicts something nice for you!

19.   Today's realization - the worst part of the marriage ceremony is when the guests come to greet you on stage You don't know most of them but still grin stupidly at them, they mumble something that you don't hear and they are as relieved as you when they walk off the stage.

20.   Today's realization - irrespective of how the new born baby looks, the maternal grandmother will ALWAYS claim that the baby looks like the father!

21.   Today's realization - 2 seconds is the time in India between the wheels of the aircraft touching the ground and the sound of the unbuckling of the seat belt while 4 seconds after is the time the overhead lockers are opened in spite of the admonishments!

22.   Today's realization - the best way to make your spouse happy is to tell her that you lost 1, 00,000 at the races, make her angry and then tell her it is actually 10,000 and then she will be fine! This is officially called Flipkarting now!

23.   Today's realization - the closest you get to feeling like Superman is when your little baby holds on to your finger and doesn't let go

24.   Today's realization - people tell about their deepest, darkest emotions and fears on Facebook to everyone but then complain about lack of privacy controls on it!!!

25.   Today's realization - the most meaningless "Happy Diwali" greeting ever is from one of your service providers (cable, broadband, mobile etc.).

26.   Today's realization - I guess they expect a year of wrong billing, unscheduled down times, pathetic customer service can be made up because they send a "non personalized, full of routine pictures of lamps and clichéd phrases" from an unmonitored email box! Yeah right!

27.   Today's realization - "Nothing" "k", "Ok" are the most powerful words in a woman's vocabulary. Small words but can have a wealth of meaning to the husband. This is the time you should go out and buy her favorite things!

28.   Today's realization - the most irritating start to a phone conversation is when an unknown voice calls you up and asks you "Who is this?"! Till now, I have not been able to figure out the best retort to it.

29.   Today's realization - there are bike drivers in Hyderabad who are fine with a head on collision just to avoid a pothole! Your brains might explode (thanks to having no helmet) but the bike should remain safe!

30.   Today's realization - how come all the TV channels run their ads at the SAME time? Whatever channel you surf during a break (to keep the remote away from the others) seems to have a commercial at the very same time!

31.   Today's realization - if only they could bottle up a baby's smell after a bath and feed, they could outsell every perfume in the world. Likewise, if they can understand the peaceful sleep the baby has after the bath/feed, they could put the Deepak Chopras and any other gurus, who teach you about inner peace, to shame!

32.   Today's realization - the best part of the conversation happens when the guests are outside the door and just about to leave - that 30 mins has sometimes the best family gossip!

33.   Today's realization - New Year resolutions are like eggs - meant to be broken! :)

34.   Today's realization - you know you are old when you have to keep scrolling in the drop down to choose your birth year in an online form. It was actually easier to type in the year directly (lesser key strokes)!!!

35.   Today's realization - unlike us, the earth works harder on weekends by rotating twice as fast and takes rest on weekdays by rotating twice as slowly. That explains why weekends go off so fast while weekdays seem to stretch.

36.   Today's realization - sometimes the joy of finding 60 rupees intact in your jeans after a wash is much more than the money you might have in the bank..

37.   Today's realization - the most inane piece of information is when the pilot tells you the cruising speed, the altitude and the temperature outside. You can't feel the speed, you don't want to test the altitude and you definitely won't keep your hand out to test the temperature!

38.   Today's realization - it is only the very young and the very old who can speak their mind freely. The first group does not know the impact and the second one does not care. The rest of us are the ones who need to be mindful about what we say all the time...

39.   Today’s realization – WHATEVER happens during the rest of the World Cup does not matter now. Today – we HAVE won the World Cup by defeating Pakistan!

40.   Today's realization (rider to the last one) - it does not matter if we don't qualify for the next round of the World Cup AS LONG AS Pakistan does not qualify too!

41.   Today's realization - the best part of February is that you work only 28 days and still get paid the full month's salary!

42.   Today's realization - the best day of the year is not your birthday, nor your spouse's birthday or even your marriage anniversary. It is actually the day when the school exams get over and frayed tempers come back to normal. The other best day, of course, is the day when school restarts and you heave a sigh of relief!

43.   Today’s realization – whether it is India or Ireland, the ads on TV are the same – promising you fitter abs or cleaner floors or whiter clothes. Even the lines on bonus offers if you call within the next 30 minutes remain the same. The only change is the accent and the currency. Global consumerism is here to stay!

44.   Today's realization - you are always 12 to your mom when she is giving advice irrespective of the fact that you are actually in your 30s, 40s, 50s or even more! ‪

45.   Today’s realization – not sure which makes me most angry – the bad luck that you get the slowest clerk in the entire shopping line OR that the products don’t get scanned automatically OR the person in front of insists on paying through a card that does not work OR a new counter opens up and everyone behind you moves to the new counter and you are now the last in the line!

46.   Today's realization - there is no difference between corporate hospitals and five star hotels - polite reception, nice rooms, multiple restaurants and good room service. The only difference is the higher costs (from the resident's perspective) and more demanding residents (from the business perspective) in corporate hospitals.

47.   Today's realization - you can look really really bad on certain days but you can never look as bad as the picture on a government issued ID card e.g. Passport, aadhar card, ration card, voter id card etc.

48.   Today's realization - no roller coaster (I repeat no roller coaster) in any amusement park in the world is as scary as sitting in a auto rickshaw while the driver whizzes around the narrow lanes in Hyderabad!

49.   Today's realization - except the bride and the groom and a very few others, no one is really interested in the marriage ceremonies. They are actually interested in 1) the food 2) what others are wearing 3) showing off what they are wearing 4) meeting others 5) the food!!

50.   Today's realization - the best coordinated departments are the Roads laying and the pipe laying one. They really work in perfect sync - the pipes department digs the next day AFTER the Roads department has laid a new road.

51.   Today's realization - the biggest win in your life is when you pretend to lose to a child and see the his/her happiness at it.

52.   Today's realization - the two biggest fights in an Indian family during summer 1) Who emptied all the cold water in the fridge? 2) Who did not fill the empty bottles? #IndianSummerMemories

53.   Today's realization - you know you are old when you have to keep scrolling in the drop down to choose your birth year in an online form. It was actually easier to type in the year directly (lesser key strokes)!!!

54.   Today's realization -the second most visible display of money, power, politics, cunningness, stealth, spying etc. is war. The first one, of course, is marriage!

55.   Today's realization - the most embarrassing moment when visiting someone's house is when they ask a 4 year old child to recite nursery rhymes and the kid refuses! The parents push him/her and give excuses, you ask to let it go (secretly relieved) and the child doesn't understand what is happening!

56.   Today's realization - the most "scenti-mental" person in the world is the crazy one who believes that all women will run after him thanks to his deo (as they promise in the ads)

57.   Today's realization - The worst part of doing all those complicated poses on Yoga day is that you notice all the cobwebs in nooks and corners as you twist and turn! ‪#‎jestsaying

58.   Today's realization - men can be the best cooks in the world when they deign to enter the kitchen but you need the world's best maid to clean up after them!

59.   Today's realization - women remember every detail - what you both wore on the first day you met, the restaurant you went to, what you ate and the "actual reason" for your first tiff. 
The men, on the other hand, don't even remember what they wore yesterday or what they had for lunch. ‪#‎jestsaying

60.   Today's realization - the origin of 'good cop, bad cop" did not originate from cops but actually from parents who played the two roles to the hilt and interchanged as required. In fact, we should call it as "good parent, bad parent"

61.   Today’s realization – the best way for family bonding is not by going to a movie or going to a restaurant or go on a vacation. It is actually when both your ISP decides to have an extended outage and hence no Internet access on all devices AND your cell phone provider has poor signals at the same time. ‪#‎thankyoubeam ‪#‎thankyouairtel

62.   Today's realization - you know you are old when you stand up to remonstrate your son and notice that you now have to look UP to meet his eyes!

63.   As they say age is just a number but then I have never been good at numbers anyway! smile emoticon

64.   Today's realization - whichever toothpaste you use (with salt, neem, coal, clove oil, prescribed by the Dental Association, by dentists practicing in the UK or any of the above combos), ultimately you WILL visit the dentist and have the same trepidation when you sit in the chair.....‪#‎youknowthedrill

65.   Today's realization - the best way to recharge batteries in the remote control is to hit it a few times- first with your hands and then on a hard surface. If that does not work, open the slot and rotate them, exchange their slots or replace them with any other used batteries lying around.
If that does not work and only IF, THEN replace with new batteries. There is no point making a fool of yourself! 😃

66.   Today's realization - the best way to recharge batteries in the remote control is to hit it a few times- first with your hands and then on a hard surface. If that does not work, open the slot and rotate them, exchange their slots or replace them with any other used batteries lying around.
If that does not work and only IF, THEN replace with new batteries. There is no point making a fool of yourself! 😃

67.   Today's realization - when a cab driver in Hyderabad says he is coming in "just" 5 minutes, he actually means 20+ minutes...

68.   Today's realization - the most irritating people are people who come to your city for work and then complain how much better it was in their old city! This can be true even when they join an organization or a team! (I am as guilty!)

69.   Today's realization - there is actually ONLY one way of getting 4G in most places in the city. Buy a dual SIM phone and get two 2G connections and claim you have 4G now. This way you also get 2G in smaller towns.‪#‎simplemath

70.   Today's realization - the old parent and the young toddler are very similar when they walk. You have your heart in the mouth when they falter with hesitant steps, hoping they wont fall and hurt themselves. Both are too proud to take the proferred hand to help them. Both have the same look of pride at the end "See - I have done it!". YOU have the proud look of the parent and the child rolled into one when you see that.

71.   Today's realization - it is the combination of garbled & incoherent announcements on flight departures AND apathetic passengers who are lost in their own world, which makes the airport employees desperately run up & down the seating areas shouting frantically "Final Call! Final Call"!

72.   Today's realization - the best exercise you can do on a cold wintry Sunday morning is press the snooze button multiple times! ‪#‎lifetips

73.   Today's realization - the very things that your parents forbid you from doing during your childhood (and for which you were punished) are the same ones that they find incredibly cute in their grand children and even encourage them. You are actually reprimanded saying "Kids will be kids".‪#‎howparentschange

74.   Today's realization - never buy a toothpaste which is recommended by 9 out of 10 dentists (even if they are shown practising in the UK!) Why would they recommend something good impacts their business negatively?!!. Find something they don't recommend - now THAT will work!

75.   Today's realization - the most irritating girl is the one in the Airtel ad who talks about downloading movies while one cannot get a decent signal to even make a phone call (and to top it - data disabled for 1.5 days with no notice - could not even download even a single email, forget movies!)

76.   Today's realization - today is the day, by when, probably 90% of the New Year resolutions are already broken. The rest 10% did not even start! :)

77.   Today's realization - it is difficult to remember the names/faces of old school mates but the minute, someone points out the wicked nickname he was given or some wacky or weird thing he had done in school, THEN all the memories start to flood in.... :)

78.   Today's realization - you really feel happy when FB introduces a feature which mirrors your exact opinion of a product (and not a Like!)

79.   Today's realization - there was always one teacher in school who claimed that THIS batch was the worst one in her experience. Of course, she repeated the statement every year!

80.   Today's realization - the most interesting discussion during an Indian marriage is the "food analysis" - of how one dish lacked salt, one was too salty and how one dish never made it to them. This, from the bunch of people, who would have gorged themselves and ensured "paisa vasool" for the gift they gave! 😝

81.   Today's realization - when they advertise a medium pizza as a meal for two, I guess they expect one of the two must be on a diet!

82.   Today's realization : Defeated Australia - Check,Defeated Pakistan - Check, Pakistan out of World Cup - Check. For some positive people, we have won the World Cup (even if we lost in the semi finals)

83.   Today's realization - some people you disliked extremely at the World Cup will now be cheered and some others whom you loved will now be booed!‪#‎ipltamasha

84.   Today's realization - unlike the rest of us mere mortals who have a list of published holidays, the nationalized banks should publish a list of WORKING days to make it easier for us to remember! ‪#‎toomanyholidays

85.   Today's realization - people have a misguided notion of sympathy. When you describe a painful ailment that is troubling you, they will tell you of THEIR travails with the same ailiment and how much more worse it was for them.

86.   Today's realization - there are 8 captains playing in the IPL, there are at least 80000 of them at home, who feel they can do better

87.   Today's realization - the second most expensive * is the one after the pizza price. It usually adds 20%+ to the 199 pizza that you felt was reasonable. The most expensive one,of course, is the one after mutual funds "mutualfundsaresubjecttomarketrisk. Pleasereadalldocumentscarefullybeforeinvesting"

88.   Today's realization - the best innovation that has improved service provider & customer interaction is the Uber star rating - suddenly both are so nice to each other! The worst innovation, of course, is the fact that Hyderabad auto drivers don't call it "half return" or "20 rupees over meter" anymore - they now call it "surge pricing"!

89.   Today's realization - you know someone is totally not into Facebook when you wish him for his birthday and then notice that your last year's greeting is still not acknowledged!

90.   Today's realization - the irony is that while you anyway lose your privacy when you join Facebook yet we feel that we can bring back our privacy by copy pasting some lines quoting some vague UCC or Rome statutes

91.   Today's realization - most Indian parents become doctors as the kids grow up and develop cough/cold/fever frequently #docwithoutlicense

92.   Today's realization - the second prize for knowing all your details (friends, events, location etc) goes to the apps in your phone. The first prize, of course, goes to the neighborhood aunties!

93.   Today's realization - medical treatment is 10% medication and 90% trust

94.   Today's realization - instead of measuring Hyderabad rains in mm or cm, they should measure it by the corresponding Uber surge prices. For example, this year we had good rains, average surge prices was 4.5 while two years back, it was only 1.2! 

95.   Today's realization - if the "as seen on TV" ads, worked ACTUALLY as they promise (reduce weight instantly, give you 6 pack abs in a few minutes, make soft rotis, make cleaning a breeze etc), then life would be so much better!

96.   Today's realization - if everyone actually read and understood every line of the Terms and Conditions of apps that they download, then there will be no users signing up for any of these apps! #noprivacy

97.   Today's realization - the best way to inspire a man to cook is make him watch him a few cookery shows and then let him loose - he might just outdo the show host! :)

98.   Today's realization - the health index of any food is inversely proportional to its taste index

99.   Today's realization - the best examples of plastic surgery are seen on Indian soap operas - either a woman who has kids getting married but looks 30 or a woman who undergoes plastic surgery and looks totally different now (thanks to an actor leaving the show!! :) )

100.   Today's realization – you realize you are getting old when your “gyaan” aka realizations reach the century mark – 1.       to an extent that whenever people meet you, they give you suggestions for a new realization!  :)  The complete list of realizations are kept at http://vishnudasprabhu.blogspot.in/search/label/Realizations

Bhagwaan and the "surprise gift" - Part 2

The story so far...

Bhagwaan has been asked by Bhagyawaan to buy her a "surprise" gift of more than 12 lakhs since Priya has been gifted a diamond necklace by her husband J. He is now travelling to Bangalore to buy it from the same jeweler on MG Road. The problem is that Bhagwaan has no money but does not have the guts to tell his bitter..sorry..better half..Now read on

After a sleepless night on the train, Bhagwaan finally reached Yeshwantpur at about 9 am in the morning. The train was late as usual. The only good thing was the pleasant weather in Bangalore. He caught an auto to go to his friend's house in Sahakaranagar (after the usual haggling & arguments over "50 rupees extra" which he lost). One he reached his friend's house, he had his bath and breakfast. He decided to visit the jewelry shop to see if he can get something for a bargain.

Suddenly, he heard a ring of the temple bell as he was walking outside - it suddenly stuck him. His friend  Ganesha! He had helped out in the past and Bhagwaan had completely forgotten about him. He went inside the temple and prayed to him with the usual terms and conditions (Rs 101/- and coconuts/banana). Feeling a bit more relieved, he walked towards the auto stand to get an auto to go to MG Road.As usual, the auto drivers were sitting around playing cards ignoring the customers. He hesitantly asked them if they could please take him to MG Road. A couple of them were nice enough and said they were going to Yelahanka and could deign to take him there, if he wanted. Finally, one of them took pity on him and said he will take him (wont get passenger from there Saar - hence one and half times of meter Saar!).

He reached MG Road and entered the jewelry shop. A beautiful young lady did a namaskar to him and asked him if he wanted coffee/tea/fruit juice. They promptly took him to the necklace section. The glittering lights and ambiance made the necklaces shine brighter than what they actually were..He liked one and pointed it to the salesman. He was pleasantly surprised to see that the price was very reasonable and he could actually afford it. The pleasure was short lived when the salesman said "That Saar is the making charges which is 10% of the total charges". He realized that he had no hope and Ganesha was his only resort. He quickly slipped away from the shop. As he was going out, there seemed to some sort of commotion near the entrance. He thought there must be some film shooting going on since some actors were dressed like cops. He quickly went back to his friend's house, again paying 1.5 times the meter fare (no passengers getting from that side Saar!).

Bhagwaan took the train back to Hyderabad (with the usual berth exchange with an old man who said he could not climb up to the upper berth). He reached home riding home an auto of a ruffian who seemed to double up as a auto driver.

He reached home prepared for the worst. As he entered the house, he saw Priya and J in the house with Bhagyawaan. What was most unusual was that Priya was crying and J was trying to console her and Priya was actually blasting off J. He was dumbfounded to see the scene. Slowly, he understood what had transpired. Apparently, the necklace gifted by J which was shining brightly at the beginning was slowly losing its color and now looked more like silver in color. The necklace was fake! 

Bhagyawaan asked him "Did you buy my necklace? I hope you did not because I understand the shop was selling fake jewellery and was raided by the police yesterday"

Bhagwaan (quickly recovering): "Oh yes. The minute I saw the necklace, I realized it was a fake. Only a trained eye can easily make out the difference and only fools will make a mistake" (giving a meaningful glance to J).

Bhagyawaan was so thrilled by his intellect and let me just close the curtains on the scenes afterwards since some kids occasionally come to my blog!

The next day, Bhagwaan woke up feeling relaxed and stress free after quite a few days. He glanced at the news paper and here is what he saw

He had a second look - Ganesh Gowda, Vignesh! Then it stuck him - his prayers to Ganesha had been answered! He thanked Ganesha again for pulling him out of a major crisis again. Of course, he will ensure that the agreed terms and conditions will be met.

He went back to his emails to check if that widow had transferred her husband's fortune to him but alas....!!

Bhagwaan and the "surprise gift" - Part 1

It was a very despondent Bhagwaan standing at the Secunderabad Railway Station waiting for the Garib Rath to take him to Bangalore. For once, I will ensure that I do not start from the middle and have you wonder - who is this Bhagwaan and why is he taking a train? Here is the background

Bhagwaan is  a middle aged (read old)  IT professional trying desperately to keep his sanity with Bhagyawaan (his wife of 18 years) He has two kids - Badu (his son of 14 going on 10) and Choti (his daughter of 9 going on 18).  There – I made a good start…

Yes – I have still not answered the second part of the question. If you are one of the three readers who actually read my blog, you might remember Bhagyawaan’s elder sister – Priya from an earlier story. She is the HR manager of a large organization and always seems to be appraising people. She is the one who makes evil Catbert (from the Dilbert series) look like a saint. Priya had married another HR professional who went by an unusual name of J. J seems to have gone up the corporate escalator and was now the HR Director of a large MNC. Now modesty and J did not go together. He ensured that he let everyone know (especially Bhagwaan) about his wealth and lifestyle. J had recently bought a diamond necklace worth 12 lakhs from a famous jeweler in Bangalore as a surprise gift for his wife. Priya was ecstatic & had spent no time in bragging about it thus ensuring that Bhagyawaan was bitten by the green eyed monster. Bhagyawaan immediately asked Bhagwaan to buy her a more expensive necklace from the same shop in Bangalore in a show of one-upmanship. Hence, Bhagwaan was travelling to Bangalore to do as he was bidden. See – we got that all straightened out, isn’t it?

Now you might still ask – why despondent? There are two reasons – 1) I wanted to show off my knowledge of English by using words that I had never heard before 2) Recently, Bhagwaan had lent some money to a widow (based on an email) whose husband had left a large fortune apparently but she needed some money first to transfer the money to Bhagwaan. Bhagwaan empathized with her situation and had promptly given the money. He had not heard from her from a long time and hence was quite broke. Given that background, he could not even tell the truth to Bhagyawaan.

Good – we got all of that sorted out. Bhagyawaan had come to the station and was giving him precise details on the kind of necklace she wanted to be “gifted”. Bhagwaan was half listening and hence was looking around the bustling Railway Station. Now I am not sure if you have seen the normal scene which you will find in most Indian stations. Let me give you a glimpse of some of typical things you will see...

·   A stray dog was moving around as if he owned the station. He was eyeing a small poodle who had come to the station with her owner. The poodle was also eyeing him surreptitiously – she might be French and pedigreed but a handsome man is a man!

·   A porter was sitting on his haunches, smoking a bidi (ignoring the No Smoking sign) and intermittently scratching his groin

·   A boy of around 20 looking at the reservation charts to see if there was girl of his age in the compartment. His face glowed when it showed that Vanisri F 19 on seat number 62. He was of course disappointed when he saw a lady of 55 on the seat (since Vanisri had already eloped with her boyfriend and hence did not turn up).

·   His friend who was pretending to look at the books of Vivekananda in the book stall but was actually eyeing some sleazy literature and trying to gather up courage to buy it.

·   A big family seeing off a nervous but excited kid who was going to Saudi Arabia for a job. He was wearing a tight suit in the Hyderabad heat and sweating profusely. He was surrounded by a group of crying women who were giving him advice while hugging him.

·   A loudspeaker announcement which came on intermittently to announce the arrival and departure of trains. Unfortunately, none of the announcements helped since the actual platform number could never be deciphered.

·   A leak in the roof led to a dripping of water of unknown sources to form a puddle on the ground

·   A beggar who was sleeping on the floor and woke up whenever he felt he could ask someone for money. Otherwise, he was playing games on his smart phone

·   A family of four where the kids were running around everywhere ignoring the threats and shouts of the parents

·   A newly married couple who were lost in each other and oblivious to the rest of the world

Hopefully, that gave you an idea of what Bhagwaan was seeing while Bhagyawaan kept rattling away. Finally, the green signal was given and Bhagwaan got into the train having promptly forgotten all of Bhagyawaan’s instructions. He sat on his seat and looked around at his co passengers.

Now passengers on Indian trains come in different varieties (for the Top 10 of them read this post). Bhagwaan was happy since he preferred a lower berth and had actually got it. In a few minutes, the newly married couple approached him. The girl with a sweet smile on her face asked “Uncle – can you exchange your berth with us?”  The husband stood in the background realizing that the bride was better at such negotiations. Bhagwaan always had a softer side to him and promptly agreed (although the Uncle piece of it rankled him). He regretted it when he saw it was the middle one of the side berths very near the toilets. Now, every time someone opened the door, the stink of urine would reach his nostrils.

He did not get much sleep that day wondering how he could manage to a buy the necklace when he had no money.

Will Bhagwaan come out of this predicament? Will he take help from his friend Ganesha? Or will it be the end of the Bhagwaan stories? Watch this space for the concluding part….